Hotwife, Vixen, Bull, Cuck, Stag, Swinger, Buck, Cougar, etc. are all labels that help identify what type of play or lifestyle dynamics certain types enjoy and partake in when it comes to consensual nonmonogamy. These terms also can be problematic. They are extremely generic in what they mean and will sometimes lead to confusion or misunderstandings because people may assume a thing that isn’t actually the case.
When looking at matchmaking profiles made by Stag and Vixen types you will sometimes see “NO Bulls.” Why no bull?
In its simplest context, a bull is a guy from outside the primary relationship who has sex with a hotwife.
A Vixen hotwife is seeking a man to have sex with, but in many cases, it is a big no to anybody identifying as a bull. No bull for the Vixen.
This is usually a situation where both the Stag and Vixen have agreed to No Bull.
If you are a man who finds the idea of having sex with a hotwife exciting and would like to be involved as a third I’d recommend reading this one and paying attention.
What you have seen on the internet as porn, memes, and cuck captions is not how it works in real life.
Most adult media dealing with hotwifing is targeted towards men into the cuckold fantasy.
It is extremely exaggerated, and not meant to be a representation of reality. Most hotwives and cucks are not into the levels of humiliation you will find in videos commercially produced by paid talent. Most memes and cuck captions are expressions of fantasy distilled down to a few words to simplify, which also makes them unrealistic.
In most of these videos, memes, captions, erotic fiction, etc. the bull is an over-the-top dominant male who uses the hotwife and humiliates the cuckold.
Even if you as a wanna-be bull somehow meet multiple hotwives with cuckold husbands it is doubtful any of them, or at least very few will be into such behavior.
Vixens and Stags are not into any of that stuff. Not at all. If they are, they’d most likely do it as a roleplay type thing with a “bull” who they’ve regularly played with after much discussion.
Stags are not cucks, nor are they beta types. They are doing what they do because they receive pleasure from what their wives are doing. They are almost always involved in picking out and vetting the extra play partners. It is even common for them to be the driving force in these activities.
The Vixen wants to please her Stag with her activities. They are a team. They work for each other’s pleasure. A Stag will want his Vixen treated with respect. If you think of her as a queen to give pleasure to and entertain you are on the right track.
The Stag will wish that treatment of her often more than she will. She is his Queen after all.
The Vixen will also want you as the third to be respectful to her husband.
Both of them can and will veto you for being an ass. They want “No Bull.”
The terms Vixen and Hotwife also have the same problem. It is like saying “pizza” and thinking you know what you’re getting. Is it a pepperoni and cheese pizza? Does it have olives? Pineapple on it? Maybe it is the works. Could be a vegan pizza.
So many varieties of pizza and hotwives exist that unless you ask you won’t know what you’re getting.
Luckily between the Stag and the Vixen you can easily find out. Ask if in doubt.
This is their game, they make the rules. If you don’t like the game don’t play. It is that simple.
Often the guys who come in swinging with bad lines and dirty talk who get excluded immediately get their ideas from the internet and are attempting to play the bull.
This is where it gets tricky.
Most Vixens and Stags will not say “No bull,” but they don’t want guys who act like that. They just hope that they get a few good ones.
Some guys who call themselves bulls have figured it out and are respectful, polite, and know how to approach and behave with a Stag and Vixen.
For example, I don’t include the no bulls statement places where we have profiles, but I certainly don’t want to deal with some jerk who thinks he should act like that.
Their messages arrive, you look, it is obvious they didn’t read your profile completely, they seem like fools, you don’t even reply because they are so off base they are not worth the time.
So you may be wondering as a single guy what a Vixen does want. You may be wondering what the Stag wants. It will differ, so consider this list a list of usually what they want.
To get through the door this is what I’d say are the most important things.
First, there must exist a bit of physical attraction. Are you their visual type? That is a given in almost any situation.
Next is personality compatibility at some level. If your vibes are way off the sex is bad, it is not fun for the Vixen to have sex with you or the Stag to watch.
Then there is hygiene. Be clean as you can be, and smell nice, but don’t put on a bunch of powerful scents.
Communication skills. Just like in the vanilla world, you will need some communication skills. Depending on the scenario you will need to be able to converse with the Stag, the Vixen, and usually both pretty well. If you have a sense of humor that fits with their style it is a huge plus.
Confidence without the cocky. If you can’t be confident you’ll likely not be able to perform either. Cockiness is a huge turn-off for both the Stag and the Vixen in almost all cases. If you turn off either one you just failed.
Relaxed attitude. This is something they want, and they want it for fun. You should be there for fun as well. The only tension in the room should be sexual tension.
Now, if you’ve gotten through the door and you are about to become the bull who doesn’t bring bullshit to the game, these are the things most Vixens and Stags will want of you.
Be respectful of the boundaries and rules you’ve been given. This is a huge one. Don’t mess around with it.
Follow along with how they want to play. If the stag says she wants a lot of foreplay and likes oral that means you should be into that. If the Vixen wants to be on top, let her be on top. Within the scope of what they are wanting, you should also be getting what you want. Make sure this is an everyone-wins type of situation. Don’t be selfish with your sexual desires. You won’t be invited back unless she feels pleased and the Stag gets a good show.
It is that simple for play, and no different than any other sexual situation. The goal should be for all parties involved to have a good experience and walk away happy.
There is a similar article to this titled Bulls Wanted – HERE that gets a bit more in-depth and tackles the subject from a slightly different angle you may be interested in.
Now, if you like the label of bull, identify as a bull, or just plain want to be a bull, awesome, but be a good bull. Be a bull that plays along with the couple’s desires and is respectful of both them as people and of how they wish to play.
It may be surprising after reading all that, but we sometimes use the term ourselves, and we use the iconography attached to it as well.
One of our favorite designs is the one shown in the previous article on this topic I referenced earlier.
This gem is perfect for any Vixen to wear anytime because it blatantly states what she is about, but at the same time is G-rated, artsy, and just a cool design. Where is the beef? It probably should be noted here that meat from a bull is primarily used for just burger because it isn’t very tender. It is however extremely lean so your extra lean burger is often a mix of cow and bull. How was that for slipping in an unrelated fun fact?
You can get this awesome design HERE – Bull Wanted by Vixen Games.
If a guy who knows about hotwifing sees you sporting it you may make a new friend.
We also have a newer design just for the bulls. Hopefully, it is for those good respectful bulls I was talking about instead of the fools that think whatever spank hub they frequent is a place to learn social skills.
The design… It is a pretty badass design I’d say, and also has a bit of humor attached via some wordplay.
It says “AvailaBull” really big and then “for Vixen Games” much smaller beneath. If you are a bull, and you are available, then this design is for you.
You can get the AvailaBull design as a shirt, hoodie, sticker, or phone case HERE – AvailaBull Bull for Vixen Games by Vixen-Games.
If we were out and about and saw an attractive man with this design introductions would happen.
Many of the shirt designs we put out are made for that reason.
We live in a world where everyone is becoming more accepting of differing lifestyles from the norm of being 100% straight monogamous vanilla folk, but we aren’t really to a point where most can be completely open about themselves.
Designs like the two shown here fit within our current world. They allow those who are in the know to recognize but allow for living in the world as it is without hassles and people who you don’t know getting in your business.