Earlier this month we gave you Why I decided to become a hotwife and everyone seemed to like it. It was one person’s reasons for becoming a hotwife. The deciding factors that made her go from fantasy to the real deal. Before making that decision and saying “I want to be a hotwife and will be a hotwife” there were many other things that pushed her in that direction. Turn-ons primarily. So now we give you What turned her on about hotwifing before becoming a real Vixen.
Note I said Vixen rather than simply Hotwife. She wanted to be a Vixen hotwife.
Aspects of hotwifing appealed to her and turned her on immensely. As in Why I decided to become a hotwife I asked the question about those turn-ons. Before you took the plunge, what were the biggest turn-ons you had when thinking about being a hotwife? Not what are your biggest turn-ons as a hotwife, but before you decided “I’m going through with this.” I asked her to toss the reality of being a hotwife out the door and think back before she made the decision. The fantasy was all that existed without any serious reality of doing it. There was only maybe and what if. I asked, and she answered, I wrote. There is no particular order here, it is just the order in which she thought of them.
This is it.
What turned her on about hotwifing before becoming a real Vixen
- The ability to get me, the husband all riled up. This would include a lot of things, but in general, she is referring to making me extremely horny and filled with want for her. In her mind the more she played the naughty Vixen hotwife the more I’d crave. The better the show the more I’d feel need. The idea of this extreme need from me towards her turned her on.
- The ability to give me anxiety and frustrate me. Not in all ways do our motivations in our Vixen Games align. In her fantasies, she would make me wait or deny me to increase my desires. She would then play off of those desires until I was frustrated. She’d tease and torment me, and make me wonder what was to happen so I’d be anxious. She was so turned on by this possibility along with being able to heighten my desire that it seemed to be her primary focus at times. Before we moved on to the point of going forward it was addressed in our first set of Hotwifing Rules.
- Getting to have multiple penis … and getting long sex sessions sometimes. That is how she worded it. I’d say cock and continuous pleasures. Basically the idea of experiencing different and multiple cocks. The idea of people moving differently, having different skills, and feeling different. Cock sizes as well. As a hotwife she could do this and do it without shame, and even be applauded in a sense for simply experiencing pleasure. The idea of variety and many turned her on. Also, she could fantasize that a sex session could go on and on to her heart’s content. Two men can make it last much longer. Or to have a sex session with a man, and that was just the prelude to what we would do.
- Mystery blindfold sex was a huge turn-on for her. This was one of our shared fantasies that we often talked about while we had sex. As fantasies go, we would often carry them beyond what the real world allows easily to be achieved. We also skipped over many aspects of how things would work out in real life. I’ll not share my favorite versions of this scenario here as this is about her turn-ons. For her, she enjoyed the idea of being tied, usually face down, and used by a mystery man who would leave before I untied her and removed her blindfold. We would then have our own time together. She also very much liked the idea of this same scenario but with multiple men. I myself would be one of these men and she would not know which one or when, but she swore she’d be able to tell. In fantasy, condoms would never be used so she’d feel each orgasm and be filled. This idea turned her on to the point she always would have huge orgasms and be soaking wet.
- “The X in the club and being used by multiple people in safe circumstances.” That was her whole answer. We saw a video tour of a particular club that had this big padded X in their group kink room. These things are called The X-cross, X-frame, saltire cross or Saint Andrew’s cross if you’d like to look them up. This one was very nice and the room was obviously designed for group play scenarios. She saw the layout and the X, and said she’d want to be put on that X. Her fantasy was to basically be tied to the X and Free Use in the room with me watching over her to make sure she was safe. It was a sensation and lack of control fantasy where she was not picking partners or caring if males or females were touching her. She would be blindfolded. I was to let it all happen and encourage all, but at the same time make sure nobody was rough, rude, etc. A sacrificial goddess is how I’d view it. This also grew to ideas of being the center of attention in other ways in a club atmosphere. Used for pleasure, given pleasure, with me watching over her so she could feel safe and secure.
- Reconnection after play events. This for her is primarily about me being wanty for her. This includes both a lovey-sweet type of reconnection and a possessive and semi-aggressive taking of her that says to her “You are mine!” In general, it depends on her mood and which type of reconnection it is that turns her on.
- “Control.” Though my Vixen doesn’t always want control, she usually does. In the case of control, it can go both ways. Hotwifing is in most cases a situation where the hotwife holds most, if not all of the control. It is her game while it is being played more than anybody else involved. Besides the control of play and scenarios, it lifts the Vixen’s control level over her Stag for a time beyond its usual level and over time may do so permanently. In her fantasy world, it gave her levels of both temporary and permanent control over me in a way that turned her on. The other direction that control can go is where she sees me as taking control, dictating play, etc. A side note here is that in general I am an aggressive and demanding person, but with her am usually not. Part of the turn-on here for her when it comes to me taking control and being possibly aggressive in my wants is that I rarely am with her. Of all the answers for this ‘What turned her on about hotwifing before becoming a real Vixen’ post, this was the one we had to discuss in length because I did not understand her views and desires in the power and control department well enough to even assume her meaning. This topic of “control” was an example to me that big discussions should be had before ever moving forward from fantasy to reality.
- Making me, the husband wait both during and after play. This was another super big one for her, but not so much for me. I already slightly mentioned this in the second one listed, and already in that same one said “Not in all ways do our motivations in our Vixen Games align.” This is an extreme case of that as I don’t like waiting or want to wait ever while the idea of making me wait gets her all riled up. It is a sort of teasing to her that makes her feel empowered sexually. The idea of denying me when I am all worked up or feeling the need for reconnection gets her juices flowing. If I were a lesser man or viewed her in any way less than the epitome of my personal desires this one quirk of hers would have made me veto going from fantasy to reality. Instead, it was addressed in our rules with comprise. Both Vixen and Stag must get what they need from these experiences, and in some cases, it is a bit of give and take that is required.
- “Lots of lingerie.” This one was funny to me because lots of lingerie would be hers anyway. I like to see her dressed up, I appreciate her beauty, and I lingerie shop online for her just for fun. This “lots of lingerie” therefore means lots of lingerie in a different context than it would have existed otherwise. The lingerie becomes more of an outfit that could not be worn outside of just with me now. It becomes icing on the cake for my watching, and part of a show she can perform which increases desire in a new way. It becomes something to shop for together with other activities in mind, to be matched with shoes, hair done, makeup, the whole event. A hyper-sexualized dressing up for a hyper-sexualized event.
- She wanted to feel desired by other people. From my perspective, it seemed odd because I can’t imagine not desiring her, but I am able to understand it a bit if I step outside myself. It turned her on to think of many people desiring her and to experience their desire. It is a sort of validation I suppose, a man going from zero to one hundred and orgasming because of her would make her feel desired. A man asking to play, a validation of her appeal. She enjoys my desire for her I know, but as all people have selfish tendencies I find one of mine in this. I care only that she feels desire when it comes to hotwifing and her desire ignites mine. I liked the idea of another being able to experience the amazingness of my Vixen temporarily, what is always mine, to feel and know her pleasure, but never thought of their desire.
- Watching my desire. This one I understand because she has always loved that I love her in a sexual and sensual way. She loves that I find her attractive beyond others, and knows she is my one. She likes that I look at her and see the object of my desire always. She knows I enjoy watching her move. To be my live-action personal pornstar she thought would make that desire climb to new heights. To move and act in ways I would want to see and get off on. Add on my impatience and my personal fetishes which she could tune into and she could make me dizzy with desire, and that in turn fueled her own.
- Pleasing me. This is to her a selfish turn-on. What turns her on partly here is the fact that she can do things which turn me on that nobody else can do simply because they aren’t her. The other part of this is feeling she is my star.
- Having me watch her orgasm by other men. How this could not be a turn-on I don’t know. To fantasize about having an orgasm and your spouse watching you with lust. She knows I’m into her pleasure, so pleasure plus more pleasure. On this one, I assumed at this discussion point I’d be witnessing the best orgasms of her life. The newness, the naughtiness, and my watching all tied up together with the normal sensations and excitement of sex. It made me a tad jealous when I first considered this aspect of it. The idea that her best orgasms ever could be with another man over and over, but I realized that though I’d be a spectator I was still a contributor. It is the combination of things that could bring her such pleasure, and without my place in the mix, it could not happen. After that I was no longer jealous of the idea, I was hopeful to occasionally see all those pieces of the puzzle fall into place and witness it.
So there it is, What turned her on about hotwifing before becoming a real Vixen.
Time for the T-shirt pitch… It has nothing to do with what turned her on about hotwifing before becoming a real Vixen.
A Vixen Wives Club T-shirt. Chose this one because I thought it was fitting and it is on purple because that is the favorite color of the Vixen who answered those questions. Isn’t like I could make a “What turned her on about hotwifing before becoming a real Vixen” T-shirt. At least I couldn’t think of anything to go with that. If you (the reader) have a what turned her on about hotwifing before becoming a real Vixen visual design idea please send it to me and I’ll make it. Just kidding, can’t be done.
You can get this sweet design on not just T-shirts, but also hoodies, and done with detailed embroidery on hats and beanies. Check it out HERE – Vixen Wives Club Tee.
If you order a shirt (or anything else with this design) via that link you’ll find a spot at the end of your order to send us a note if you wish.
A cool note would be to include one thing you have said if this ‘what turned her on about hotwifing before becoming a real Vixen’ post was about you. Or if the item is a gift and you happen to be the Stag in the relationship you could have it be “what turned her on about hotwifing before becoming a real Vixen I think.” Something like that, we’d love to hear it. Fun if it is some of the same things, and educational and interesting if it is something completely different. Obviously, this is a just-for-fun thing, no messages are necessary at all, we just love people getting our shirts.