It’s a constant thing to get “What’s the difference between a Hotwife and a Vixen?” as a question.
We have covered this topic a few times in various ways… for example with our Vixen Definition.
Also when we answered the question “What is a stag husband?“
Then again when we discussed The basic benefits of being a Vixen, or when we gave a Generic definition of what a Vixen Hotwife is.
Check out all those posts if you’d like to get a bit more in-depth and get some history on the terms.
We’re going to tackle the topic in a slightly different manner here to really lay it out.
The difference between a Hotwife and a Vixen can be summed up pretty easily, but to truly understand it we’ll delve deeper.
First of all, we can say that all Vixens are Hotwives, but not all Hotwives are Vixens.
A vixen is a type of hotwife.
At its most basic level, a Hotwife is a married woman who is allowed and/or encouraged by her husband to pursue sexual relationships with other individuals besides himself without any quid pro quo type stuff attached.
That is it.
The variety of ways this can take place in a relationship is endless.
Being a Vixen is one of those ways.
A Vixen Hotwife is a married woman who has sexual relationships outside of her marriage,
with the full knowledge and encouragement of her husband in a manner that brings pleasure to all parties involved.
To be a Vixen she must be married to a Stag husband.
You cannot have one without the other.
Stags and Vixens are team players.
The Vixen’s husband is almost always present for play, and it is usually an unbreakable rule.
The Vixen’s actions when playing with others are always meant to add something good to her primary relationship with her Stag.
A Vixen never humiliates or degrades her husband. She holds him as number one at all times and he (The Stag) maintains veto powers over all play partners and scenarios. He may often act as a gatekeeper, but that isn’t required.
Most importantly a Vixen and Stag dynamic requires the Vixen and Stag to maintain emotional and even social monogamy. They may share physically, but that is the end of it, and they do it in a manner that brings pleasure to them both and strengthens their bond.
Recently when discussing the difference between a Hotwife and a Vixen online I have noticed people who have minimal contact with people in such relationships, but practice some sort of nonmonogamy or monogimish lifestyle that is seemingly adjacent to a Vixen and Stag lifestyle attempting to explain it to vanilla people in a manner that doesn’t really fit.
Often they are hotwives of another sort. Usually, it is swinger couples who are “influencers” or lifestyle advocates. Their knowledge is often secondhand or even just a repetition of things they themselves have read on Reddit, Twitter, etc.
Most often they describe a basic hotwife scenario in a generic sense and add in that the Stag husband is the difference. They say the Stag husband is different than a cuckold husband by the fact that he is not into humiliation, degradation, submission, etc.
They often title him an alpha male.
All of that is wrong except the part where the Stag isn’t into the degradation, submission, and humiliation stuff.
A Stag husband need not behave or view themselves as an alpha type.
You can also be a hotwife married to a very dominant and powerful man and not be a Vixen. Hotwifing doesn’t require a submissive husband. He may just get off on the idea his wife is being a bit naughty. He may like the idea she can be hypersexual. He could have any number of reasons to be into his wife’s hotwifing and still be what many in society deem an alpha type. That doesn’t make him a Stag, nor his wife a Vixen.
There are men who are Stags married to Vixens that society may deem as meek or less than strong.
Their relationships with their Vixens are strong though. They play an active part in her adventures, and the Vixen wife always has her Stag’s enjoyment and happiness in mind as she entertains herself, her husband, and the lucky people she plays with.
Just like in a completely vanilla monogamous relationship, with a Vixen and Stag relationship, it is not required for a man to be a burly tough guy or captain of industry to have an equal and amazing relationship with their spouse.
So, the difference between a Hotwife and a Vixen is not the husband being alpha or beta.
For the record, I detest those terms and am using them because they are often used when discussing the difference between a Hotwife and a Vixen regarding the husbands of the hotwives.
I don’t go for the whole Alphas, Beta, Gammas, Omegas, Sigmas crap.
As stated earlier, a Vixen is a type of Hotwife. Hotwifing can encompass many styles of play and relationship dynamics.
Many Hotwives go on dates with other men. Many even go on weekend getaways with them. Some men married to Hotwives never even meet their wives’ play partners.
Some hotwives cheat and sneak, some rub their dalliances with others in their husband’s faces. Some deny their husbands’ sex or specific types of sex that they have with others. Some Hotwives have long-term affairs or boyfriends.
Vixens do none of these things.
A Vixen’s actions are always executed in a manner meant to enhance the bond they have with their husbands. They don’t hang out with their bulls outside of play times, and it is just for play. They are always making sure they have the approval and encouragement of their Stag husbands in all their hotwifing actions.
The Vixen’s husband is involved and aware of everything. They are usually present for all activities, often as a watcher or full-on participant. They are part of the vetting process for playmates, and frequently they are the ones who set up everything.
Another misconception about Vixens and Hotwives, in general, is that the husbands of Hotwives are completely monogamous themselves.
This is often the case with hotwife scenarios, but it is not a rule.
First of all, there exists a lot of crossovers.
A couple who is in the swinger lifestyle may play with other couples two or three times a year for example, but the wife wants a bit more… she becomes a hotwife as well.
There are also a lot of hotwives with husbands who are bisexual and who sometimes play with their hotwives and their bulls on occasion in that manner, but the basic relationship revolves around the wife’s hotwife activities.
When you start looking at the Vixen and Stag dynamics you rarely get a 100% monogamous male.
Usually, but not always, what you have is a couple who on the surface operate similar to how the majority of couples in the swinger lifestyle operate, except that the Vixen is the center of attention in the lifestyle and their activities primarily revolve around her being with other men.
They may as a couple even swing regularly, but she plays more. She may be bisexual or straight, and her Stag husband encourages her to play with or without him being actively involved in a physical manner for both her enjoyment and his.
She as a Vixen is always playing with her enjoyment and his as a goal as well.
Stags and Vixens are always a team.
One of our continuously best-selling shirt themes are the ones we make that say “Always Together” and feature a Stag and Vixen in various ways as the central design.
The reason for this is that Stags and Vixens are always together, and in it together, and working together as a couple above all else.
That aspect of the Vixen lifestyle is required to be a Vixen.
That is not required to be a Hotwife in general though.
It is an ideal and wish of many couples to have the always together, in it together, and working together as a couple above all else type relationship when they get married. Vanilla, poly, monogamish, doesn’t matter… it is a common wish and goal when people get married. It is not usually the outcome.
With Vixens and Stags, it is a requirement.
Since I’m ending on that note I’ll lead you to a hoodie with our latest version of that theme.
You can get this Vixen and Stag Always Together Classic Hoodie on our site HERE.
You can also get it as a sticker via our RB Vixen Games portfolio HERE – Vixen and Stag Always Together Power Team Sticker.